LOVE IN PRESENT, LOVE IN PAST

Dear friend, I read all your messages and they impressed me very much . First of all I want to tell you that you are not a weak man as you wrote... Feelings are not weakness . They are from God and all of us have feelings for everything around us, for the other human beings, for music, for nature and for all the small things or big ones. It is very true that almost all the people hide their inner thoughts and desires for the benefit of the society , religion or family....and unfortunately they get old together with their hidden dreams into their hearts and mind. I feel so sorry for the human beings, for their sufferings in so many fields, not only for the lack of love they dreamed since young age but also for the bad conditions of life they are offered in most of the countries in the world. I also ask myself and the other smart people I know about this phenomenon of hiding our feelings when we love but all the people don't know the answer. It's very hard to understand God's creation : Us and the Universe ! I read a lot about Life , Soul and Love expressed by the uncontrolled beautiful attraction between man and woman. I agree with the Law of Attraction and with God's love. They are the same. I discovered that there is 100 % physical attraction between the two genders as though they were flames in the same fire and when the souls attraction appear, the so called spiritual love, this is heavenly and impossible to explain in words even by the men of science or anybody. So, dear friend, you are not weak at all, you are a very powerful man with heavenly feelings based on your vital energy from God. Your wish to see a human being who inspires you a lot is a normal thing, it's the tool of an artist at least, you being a very creative man of science who needs much more than the common people : to see, to know and to discover the unknown...to fulfill your dreams beyond your eyes, you know the best your universe !! My consciousness is that who dictates to me the contrary of my feelings and thoughts for a man because they are not accepted by my family and also by me...very curiously : I have dreams, they come true and when they are very close to me, I don't accept them because of shame and because of the laws of the society in which I live and I was educated. I am not shy if a man doesn't ask anything concern- ing my body. I think it is normal. I am me and my body is very private. When I will be sure that I love and I am loved in the same measure, I will be very happy to give all I have and all I can and to receive the same from the beloved. What is shame ? I think that shame is the lack of safety in the other people. I think that I can be safe if I trust a man 100 % for all my life. No matter if it is friendship or heavenly love...we need 100 % safety and protection in order to feel happy without any fear in the society where we are born. My explanation is just my theory but of course I feel the shame in the deep core of my heart and mind. I feel my heart beating so fast that I can not breath some times... My dreams are my wonderful moments in life ! They inspire me and make me happy ! You are one of my dreams...you have realized it when you invited me to be your companion in the journey around the world...I know it was your wish of that moment when you were walking along the sea but it was wonderful for both of us. I would like to spend all my life together with a man who has the same dreams and desires in life like me, very smart, good and wise man to love me as he loves his own being and me the same. As about your questions about teaching you to deal the higher authorities and about your isolation in study and research...I have my answers and I give them to you in some minutes...my sweet ! It is not easy to understand our society no matter the country. Unfortunately, all the people who are voted to represent Us in Government change their minds very quickly when they meet the opportunity to get rich by ugly business using their high positions in politics or administration. Corruption is high up to the sky here and in many countries, as I know . I can not believe that so much Bad can happen in my country and in others, too, in the world ! Your question is very smart and wise....but it is also my own question. What can I teach you about dealing the higher authorities when I don't believe in anyone ? We are member of the European Union and our Govt. is obliged by the EU rules to do what it is said. We also are member of NATO and our Govt. must respect all the decisions of this international organization because it signed a contract and our old "friend", Russia is very upset on Ro. because we left the Communism. I see that any country must be allied with a world power...if not, the country is lost in space from all points of view. So, I think that we must be very wise concerning our own life and our family life . We must know Psychology and Politics in order to face the real life ... with it's Bad and Good. We must choose the Good for us and be polite with everybody until we realize what we wish. We have to do what we are required to do some time with Faith in God, of course who teaches us only to be good with all the people. As about the possibility to change the Present in Better, I think that it is possible only by spreading Love around us because love is the single feeling that touches everyone including a killer. I watched TV talks with killers in prison and my conclusion is that those killers were not loved by anybody, neither by their "family" nor by other people. In Ro there are priests who go to the prison weekly and tell the prisoners loving and forgiving words from God and Jesus and I could see them listening with pleasure the good words which they had never heard in their life. They wanted to know Love !!! I think that all the bad people can be healed of Badness and can be taught the Good and Love ...but all we need is wise and smart people who are able to teach the Bad people in order to be Good and to believe in God ! God is everything : our Breath, Love, Life, Happiness !!! You say that you performed in very high academic places. In Islamabad ? If you have this experience you have to know the reality in those academic universities. You should know their mentality and ability to lead the others and also their behavior with their colleagues, as you were at that time. I think that everything depends on our behavior and intelligence in any society. I know from my mother that she succeeded in business and in any society from other countries, only by her very good qualification and her own intelligence. Nobody except God helped her in life and she had to grow up alone two children from small age until now. Maybe she was educated very well by my grandfather who was a very smart and wise man. My grandmother is also a very gifted woman and very courageous human being, even if she remained widow...like your mother. We have the same destiny as I can see...and the same souls as you said : synchronicity ! Now an idea comes to my mind: it is possible that our common elements in our physical bodies and the same Light of our souls in the Universe to have met each other some months ago and the Law of Attraction proves to be very true. Also the Faith in God about God's will in Light ! Light attracts Light ! I feel this is true. I have much more questions about our existence in the world and about the attraction between men and women and Love. Love is only feeling. When we start to calculate the interests in marriage, there is not Love. I couldn't live a single day with a man whom I don't love ! I would like to live a life with such a smart and good man who will have tales to tell me millions of nights ... At your question about the necessity of patience in the society, you are quite lovely ans sweet like a holy child, my dear ! I agree with your desire, of course . I would like that good understanding the men of science to rule all the societies. I think that your Govt.is very good with you, as I could understand from you. I also think that you are too good in front of any teacher or Govt. and it's only You who made them give you what you deserve , including Amanda and UK. The breath given by God make them recognize God's child, You ! They have the best feelings when they meet your soul, God's soul ! You are such a good and very smart man ...That's why I love your soul and mind , you know it . Your idea of writing an article about a kind of patience of the authorities is very beautiful, you make me smile and feel like embracing you with love...I want to talk with you about this because more thoughts are coming to my mind now and I want to write a very attractive article for everybody. About your feeling of isolation a long time in research, it's the same issue of all the men of science, dear Fani and you know it. You chose to study because you like studying very much. I know it from your beautiful explanations you gave to me every time when we talked. I am not a man of science but I understand everything you tell me about your robots and I am still very curious to know more about your research. You impress me very much with your passion in looking for the unknown and with the comparison of your work with the aunts' behavior. I used to observe the aunts hours and hours when I was a little girl...they were very nice and interesting working. You are like Einstein who usually explained his grandmother his discoveries and if his grandmother was able to understand his ideas, all the people were able to understand him. I think that you like my comment upon your messages and even if I have more things to write, for example about my grand grand father who fought during the second world war in Germany where he was captured and made a prisoner of a German officer who used him to take care of his horses and after four years of service... he came back home by foot because he didn't have money to travel by train or by military car. He walked three months....I am his follower in tourism... Poor man ! I put an end to my story... It's 2,30 am and I have to go to bed. I wait for the moment when we will have the same time and we will be able to talk at the same hour or almost. When you will come to UK, soon. Much love and hugs, God bless you ! Haminia